The legally trained divorce mediator, ‘the officer of the court’, can use the law as a frame of reference for his conduct, but the psychologically trained divorce mediator, ‘the healer of the family’ has no such device. His primary tools are techniques to improve the communication skills of parties, their decision-making process and respecting systemic regularities, in particular where it concerns the interests of the children, i.e. visitation rights.Divorce mediators without legal training are hampered by the absence of a clear frame of reference. They are susceptible to subjective interpretations of events, counter-transference phenomena and partiality. The divorce mediator is himself his most important instrument, but also the most vulnerable.

This article focuses on the different outcomes of mediation when starting at various moments in the divorce process. The assumption was that conflicts would escalate more the later the mediation began and as a consequence would affect the results of the mediation. This assumption was confirmed by research data. Not only is the chance of reaching agreement higher early in the divorce process, parties are also more satisfied with the mediation, regardless of the outcome. These results advocate referral to mediation in an early stage. However, referral to mediation should also be possible in a later stage.

In this contribution media and other instruments which may contribute to the improvement of the life of parents and children during and after divorce are discussed. One such instrument is the film ‘What is mediation?”. The project was carried out by the Centre Education Daycare (Vormingscentrum Opvoeding Kinderopvang) and supported by the Flemish government and the King Boudewijn Foundation.

After a brief analysis of concepts of culture, conflict and conflict resolution, this contribution discusses how mediation and its practices are perceived in different cultures and countries. It appears that mediation is one of the most common forms of conflict resolution applied across a diverse range of cultures. In this respect, the author raises the question whether this also implies that there is a shared understanding of what mediation is or should be.

After having explained what the function and role of a quantity surveyor is, the author describes his first acquaintance with mediation in the construction industry. One of his major observations is that ‘we quantity surveyors have been mediating long before mediation was a twinkle in the eyes of the legal fraternity’.

In companies people work together intensively, especially in family run companies. In such a situation, the interests (income, capital and employment) can be enormous when parties fail to live up to each others expectations.How to deal with situations when parties are in a dead-lock and the continuity of the business is at stake? Depending on the legal form of the company and the type of conflict, there are different legal actions to settle a (legal) conflict. However, there are so many rules and different procedures for each type of legal form, that it may dazzle the reader. Moreover, these procedures may take a long time, while the parties in a family dead-lock desire an expert/arbiter/mediator proceeding expeditiously.In a sense a marriage is also a family run company. The following experiences from the area of family law are described: the processes of a divorce, the break-up announcement (the opposite of the marriage proposal), the experiment in court with the so-called regierechter in family cases, the prenuptial agreement and the plan for parenthood after a divorce. Our conclusion is that in case of a dead-lock, parties need to have a good set of rules on the settlement of disputes, to find a qualified expert/arbiter/mediator having knowledge and experience in financial/tax/pension/legal matters and familiar with dealing with emotions in a deadlock.

From 22 to 25 October 2009 the conference ‘Reflections and Visions: Celebrating Past, Present and Future’ was held in Minneapolis under the auspices of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals. Amongst the speakers were Daniel Shapiro focussing on emotions in negotiations, Gary Friedman dealing with self-reflection by collaborative professionals, and Jennifer Lerner discussing the role of emotions when taking decisions.

On Friday 23 October 2009 the seminar ‘Mediation and administration of justice’ was organised by the Belgian Federal Mediation Commission (Federale Bemiddelingscommissie), GEMME (Groupement Européens des Magistrats pour la Médiation) and Studipolis.The focus of this seminar was on the Belgian mediation act of 21 February 2005 and the European mediation directive of 21 May 2008.

In this report the author gives his personal impression of his involvement with the development of mediation in Rumania inter alia by training and educating aspirant mediators.